Sree - get out!
Posted by Dan Curley
When Big Brother asked Sree what he thought his chances of surviving the eviction were a couple of days ago, he said: “200%!” But tonight, the only two large things he got were two gigantic fingers from the public telling him exactly where to go. Sree has been slung into the BB skip, where we have no doubt he’ll be looking for bits of wood to put together so he can assemble a pole vault, allowing him to fly back into the house to further sex-pest Noirin.
He was an excruciating contestant to watch for pretty much all of his time in the house. Possessing less sexual awareness than a heroin addicted weasel, he spent his entire time scurrying after Irish beauty Noirin in such a creepy fashion that it made us want to rip out our own teeth and use them to chew our own eyeballs to bits. A man clearly with no plutonic female friends, we wouldn’t be surprised if the only woman he knows in the outside world is the one who spat him onto it.
Sree’s last show was not an uneventful hour - his feud with Marcus transcended from heated into a full-blown Chernobyl meltdown. Ignited by Marcus putting on an Indian accent in a scene that smacked of Jade Goody’s (RIP) run in with Shilpa Shetty, this escalated to Marcus pretty much threatening him: “Why don’t you come over here and make me shut up? Don’t say a single thing inside here - let’s see if you’re so brave outside!” Marcus – you’re a bad, angry and ill-conceived bloke, and we hope you’re next out so you can dust off with Sree. Providing Sree can have a baseball bat with nails in it - it could be good fight.
Sree walked into the most volatile volley of boos in recent Big Brother history, and things got worse as he walked down the ramp only to meet Kelly Osbourne, who according to Davina is a “Big Brother expert and fan”.
The virtuoso didn’t fail to impress with her BB wizardry: “Which one’s Marcus?” and “Noisine, Narine, what’s she called again?” were two of her expert contributions. Please leave our TVs alone, Kelly, and go and get job.
When Davina quizzed Sree if he really was in love with Noirin: “No, not at all.” So that’s the end of that then. The whirlwind stalk-mance is over.
Goodbye Sree. And if you ever find yourself around our way – leave, or we’ll get a court injunction against you AND release the hounds.
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>> His name is Dan Curly, and he's bloody right about it all!
Aaawww... thanks!
Posted by: Dan Curley | 06 July 2009 at 02:43
"A man clearly with no plutonic female friends, we wouldn’t be surprised if the only woman he knows in the outside world is the one who spat him onto it."
Hit the nail on the head !!!
Posted by: AntiSree | 04 July 2009 at 13:47
SREE IS OUT, SREE IS OUT, SREE IS OUT! Thank bloody God! What a complete norbit head he was! Next out, should either be fat gob Karly or please-wear-a-bra Lisa!
Posted by: SREE IS OUT! | 04 July 2009 at 13:17
I think the person who wrote this is a tad insecure about everyone and everything?
Posted by: Des | 04 July 2009 at 12:53
His name is Dan Curly, and he's bloody right about it all! The only thing he CAN write about is a "load of criticism" because that's all there is to say! Last night Davina even gave a "load of criticism" because with Sree there's nothing else you can say except for criticism! He's an idiot who cannot conjugate an English word if his life depended on it!
Posted by: Sweety Pie | 04 July 2009 at 12:45
Wow whoever wrote this, your a great jounalist. All you can think to write is a load of criticism.
Posted by: sharn | 04 July 2009 at 11:51